Every one of us probably knows a couple that has a near perfect marriage. You know, the couple that adoringly puts on public displays of affection, has 2.5 angelic children, a fluffy dog, the 2,900 square-foot house with gabled roofs-- you get the picture. Imagine the surprise when you find out that Barbie and Ken are getting divorced and Ken is running off with Brittany, the 16-year-old babysitter.

Recently,a few friends came over and amid the usual gossip, we learned that three of the couples we know are now going through the divorce process. It was an evening of mouths hanging open. As we picked our jaws up from off the floor, one of our friends said, "I sure hope it isn't contagious!"

According to a recent Oprah show, the divorce rate is now hovering at 58%. Scary statistics! But what does it really mean? Does it really mean that marriage is destined to fail more often than not? Or does it simply mean that having a marriage publicly go bust is more common today than it was 50 years ago?

Most likely, both reasons can be reflected in the statistics. It is possible that many couples get married today without seriously contemplating the meaning of marriage vows. Many couples enter marriage with the mindset of "well, if it doesn't work out, we can just get divorced."

Ho hum.

Perhaps I'm exaggerating just the slightest bit. All the more reason to follow a recipe for a long-lasting marriage: a partner that is both your best friend and your soul mate. If you've got that combination, it's a sure-fire way to make that commitment to each other a lot easier.

Have you ever seen one of those computer enhanced photo-editing programs that allow you to make changes to your picture and see what you would look like when you age? I think every engaged couple ought to plug in their pictures and take a look-see at what they would look like 50 years down the road. If you can stomach the picture, well--you've got yourself a keeper!

Seriously, all humor aside, if you've indeed found your best friend and soul mate, then there's not going to be a doubt in your mind that this is the person that you want to wake up with many, many years later. Passion may lose that edge, but a friendship and a heart-felt connection to each other will take you through many ups and downs.

My husband and I have been together for 22 years and married for 17 years. He's definitely my best friend and my soul mate.

On most days.

I can't imagine how we would have gotten through the trying times without having that bond between us. We each have our quirks and habits that drive each other batty at times, but we manage to balance that out with some light-hearted moments and some knee-slapping memories.

I'll never forget the time when I came home from teaching a class and I received a ticket for speeding and a $65 fine. My husband went into one of those "blah-blah-blah" rants and reminded me that this ticket couldn't have come at a worse time. Then a few weeks later, the hubby arrived home in a bad mood. I couldn't figure out what was wrong, until finally, with some prompting, he told me the news: he had gotten a ticket on his way to work. He really didn't want to share it with me because he felt so sheepish after the hollering he did about my ticket.

I kept a straight face as he shared the news, yet inside I was laughing my butt off.

But wait, there's more.

Just minutes after receiving the first ticket, he took off again, in a hurry to get to work because he was now late. Just a few miles per hour over the speed limit, he saw another cop in his mirror.

He gets pulled over yet again! Another ticket, different cop.

By this time, I'm on the floor cracking up.

Needless to say, he's never razzed me about my driving again.

All of the advice that you find in magazines and books written on marriage sometimes sounds so cliché. I've found that sticking to a few that work makes a marriage go a long way.

The number one rule for us is to love each other and make time for each other. Anyone who's raising kids knows how easy it is to put the spouse on the back burner while tending to everything else. And then when you find yourself finally catching a few words at the end of the day-the next thing you know, the sun is coming up and the 2-year-old is bouncing on the bed. You've nodded off in mid-sentence--yet again. My husband and I try to indulge in "our" time on a regular basis (and no, this doesn't always mean a romp in the bed, although that's a good use of "our" time) and trade off babysitting with a few friends so that we can do a few things together.

Back when we were engaged, we were learning a few things from couples that had been married many years, one piece of advice stuck out: "The best thing that a father can do for his children, is to love their mother."

And vice versa.