My sister is pregnant with twins, spontaneous twins (no fertility help).  Though the thought of twins before she was growing them in her womb, made her want to contemplate abstinence, now that they are here (well…..almost…any week now), she is doubly in love and beyond excited to meet her little Regan Christine and Callie Jeane.

My husband and I are fertility challenged. Next month represents the beginning of the end to our last hope of having biological children, InVitro Fertilization (IVF).  If we do become pregnant, we have a 70% chance of bearing multiples.  I have always wanted a large family, and the thought of twins has always more than excited me (my husband…not so much).  But…if I knew I could have children without medical help,  even before knowing what I know about fertility treatment now, would I embrace fertility treatment for the sole purpose of creating multiples……..a big, loud, adamant NO!

Some of you might agree with me. I however know that there are many of you reading this that do not. How do I know this?  There is a discussion forum that focuses on this.  As shocking as that is to me, I have learned that woman will put their bodies, their mind, their marriage, through torture in the form of hormones, debt, emotional ups and down, self-inflicted shots, multiple doctor's appointments a week, did I mention debt, uncontrollable mood swings, the stress of wondering if the twins will be healthy, the stress of wondering if more than two babies will be created, and depression….all for twins.

Again, I love the idea of twins.  My, nearly 30 year-old mind is more mature than it used to be when I was in my fairy tale land I call my early 20's and I now have a better idea of how much work twins are.  I am not as excited by them as I used to be….but….I would still ecstatically embrace the many joyful elements that come with a dual bundle of love.   However, not at the cost of unnecessary fertility treatments……there are so many negative aspects to fertility treatment. I mentioned them above briefly, but if you really think about what that list reads, really think about it, is it even fathomable that a fertility healthy couple would want to make themselves susceptible to the many short-term and long-term damaging components of fertility treatment….for twins……and we have not even discussed the medical stress that is placed on the little dual bundle of love that is being created.

There are many statistics about rearing twins that my sister has found that support the thought that purposely  "inducing" multiplies can be seen as selfish.  Some of these thoughts are: bed rest which takes its toll on your current kids, as well as your marriage, unfixable damage to your body,  pre-term labor which can lead to developmental issues, painful procedures  to help your twins recover from issues caused by pre-term labor, raising twins is researched as harder on a marriage than raising singletons, and if developmental issues are severe enough, they can follow your babies through life.

Reading the discussion on this subject, I can see that there are many very different views on this. However, one thing that I have learned from taking part in IVF, is that everyone has an opinion, and everyone is right….in their own mind.  But, the path one takes has to be one that the individual is 100% confident in, so that the right thing for the individual is done, and so that is can be held strong to when it is criticized, and if the many negative incidents listed above present themselves.  So even though I do not agree with engaging in fertility treatments for the sole purpose of having multiples for - the sake of stress on the couple and the future multiple – it’s not up to me…thank goodness, I have too many other things to decide.

Is it wrong to seek fertility treatments in order to have twins or more babies? – Baby Center