For those of you who think that parenting is not a team sport, consider this: a study out of Princeton University has found that not only is a father’s involvement important to their children’s development (something most parents already know), but that it takes the mother’s acceptance of his ways as well as her logistical and emotional support for it to really work best. The findings, part of the Fragile Family and Child Wellbeing Study, lend support to the idea that fathers may do things differently, but rather than try to force them to conform to their ways, moms should embrace this difference and work together with them.

In the past, fathers have shouldered the blame for their lack of involvement in their families, and in many instances, rightfully so. But a growing body of evidence is finding that though men are clearly responsible for their actions, or lack thereof, there is a distinct possibility that it is not completely their fault. In fact, there might be circumstances that make it all the more difficult for them to be involved and end up simply discouraging them.

Even in lieu of the fact that men are more involved than ever with their families, there is a sense that the parenting environment is still not conducive to encouraging their participation. Indeed, some would go so far as to say that there are forces conspiring against them as they try to integrate into what is still a predominantly woman’s world. As a result, a woman’s support is more important than ever in determining his level of involvement.

One key aspect of this interaction is nurturing domestic harmony whereby husband and wife not only get along, but have mutual respect for one another. This would entail a supportive environment that is devoid of criticism or insults, a willingness to compromise and make certain sacrifices, express love and affection for one another, and offer encouragement when it involves child rearing. Most importantly, perhaps, is the understanding that dads are dads, and not moms, and because of this, do things their own way.

This, of course, is not necessarily a bad thing, and children probably benefit from the man’s perspective. In fact, research indicates that a father’s influence tends to encourage children to take risks and solve problems on their own. Men tend to be more actively involved in physical activities and bring a masculine perspective into the picture.

With this in mind, it seems that healthy parenting boils down to a healthy interaction between husband and wife, one that is based on communication and mutual respect, as well as support on many levels. This, in turn, will go a long way in encouraging father’s to be more involved with their kids, which every mother can appreciate.

So maybe it’s not such a bad idea for parents to be open to all the possibilities and rather than try to micromanage each other, find some common ground where they can work together. Moms and dads might view their families differently and approach parenting accordingly, sometimes markedly so, but it is the children who will ultimately benefit from the diversity of experiences.